


The Hazardous Job

by waldorph



Category: Leverage
Genre: Action/Adventure, M/M
Language: English
Status: Completed
Published: 2009-05-07
Updated: 2009-05-07
Packaged: 2017-10-02 19:38:19
Rating: Teen And Up Audiences
Warnings: Creator Chose Not To Use Archive Warnings
Chapters: 1
Words: 914
Publisher: archiveofourown.org
Story URL: https://archiveofourown.org/works/9904
Author URL: https://archiveofourown.org/users/waldorph/pseuds/waldorph
Summary: <blockquote class="userstuff">
              <p>Their lives are dangerous, no matter how good they make it look.</p>
            </blockquote>





	The Hazardous Job

Their jobs are hazardous.

This might be an understatement, but they make it look so easy, so good- sometimes Hardison can forget that, yeah. It's hazardous.

That first year, Sterling was like the boogeyman in their closet- he went away and suddenly everything was, you know, sunshine and rainbows.

Well, except for the whole Nate-trying-to-pickle-himself thing, but they're working on it.

Last week Parker put Listerine in Nate's scotch.

Week before it was leftover au jus from the roast beef Eliot had randomly cooked.

Funny shit, man. Fun_ny_ shit.

But that's not the point. The point is that their jobs are hazardous.

Alec is used to being able to talk his way out of just about anything- if you keep talking, people ain't shooting, and you got a better chance of winning them over.

He's just sayin'- certain people might want to take note of this particular technique, instead of just staying quiet with that stupid little smirk and the stupid, _stupid_ hair-

Anyway.

He's talking their way out of this one- he's Haitian this time (ever since that Bad Boys II movie came out, everyone's convinced Haitains are badass motherfuckers. They are, but it's nice to kinda have a pop culture reinforcement). Eliot is doing that thing where he just crosses his arms over his chest so his shirt pulls over his biceps in a _really_ distracting way.

This is their schtick- Alec talks and talks and talks, and Eliot just stands there, glaring at everyone from behind his hair. If things go south, Eliot issues a threat, or he just points the gun and goes, "Yeah" when the baddies blink at him.

Only this time, the shot rings out and it's not one of the bad guys who goes down, it's Eliot.

Alec can't properly compute it- Eliot does _not_ get shot, man. But here he is, clutching his shoulder and bleeding everywhere.

And Alec is the one with the gun- or he was, but Eliot does that _I am a **man**, Goddamnit, and I do not feel pain_ thing and grabs it with his _bad arm_ (which is badass, sure, and certain parts of Alec appreciate it, but also so very stupid), and then _bam, bam, bam_ the baddies are dead.

Because River Tam ain't got nothing on Eliot Spencer.

"Come on, man, we've gotta get you to a hospital," Alec urges, and Eliot hands him back the gun, looks at the blood all over his shirt and arm, and then says,

"I don't think I can get up."

Which is about when Alec freaks out.

He stays freaked out when they get to the hospital, and yeah, they're in Massachusetts so he hacks into the system on his cell phone and _bam_ they're Mr. &amp; Mr. Spencer.

Nate is tinny in Alec's ear, and even Parker is getting concerned because they're getting only Alec's half of the conversations ("Car jacking, we were just going into the parking lot, they came out of nowhere." "No, he doesn't have any allergies to medication." "Two years next month." "Can I see him?" "How- what does that mean?")

Sophie shows up first. He manages to tell her that the bullet wasn't in his shoulder, it went under his collarbone and sent bone fragments into his chest cavity.

Nate and Parker clean up the mess, police come to get a statement, and then yes, Mr. Spencer can come see his husband.

Sophie doesn't even raise her eyebrows, and he loves her for it. Really does love her for it.

Eliot is disgruntled, gauze wrapped around his shoulder and an IV in his arm, and Alec has to just stand there for a moment, because _damn_. He could have-

"Dude," Eliot hisses. "Why you gotta make us _gay_ all the time?"

It's an opening- an invite for Alec to laugh and joke and make everything okay, to pretend that this isn't as bad as it is, that neither of them are as shaken as they are.

"Because, you asshole," Alec manages around the lump in his throat, crossing to the bed, "we fucking _are_ married."

And he leans down and kisses Eliot, a Jack Harkness kind of kiss, if Eliot were like the Ninth Doctor- and yes, okay, maybe people have a point about him being a geek.

And Eliot smirks under his lips.

"Well. 'Bout damn time."

Alec sits beside him, and when he laces his fingers through Eliot's, Eliot doesn't say anything.

* * *

Parker squeals. And asks really, really inappropriate questions.

Alec could not have forseen that Eliot would find it funny to give Parker pamphlets and rent her gay porn, but Alec will smother him in his sleep some night.

Nate is worried about their "dynamic"- like the team's gonna be fucked if priorities have changed.

Alec can't even muster a proper argument, and Eliot looks like he might take the pool stick to Nate's head, but it's Sophie who comes in and points out that Alec and Eliot have been dating since they met, and if she and Nate could handle their priorities for a year and then some, then maybe two people in a functional relationship will be alright.

And it is.

Eliot is still badass, though he gets _wicked_ pissed when Alec tells him that he's like River and makes him watch _Firefly_ ("Dude! She's a tiny chick! Do I look like a tiny chick to you?!").

It had taken three (3) blowjobs to smooth that over.

Not that Alec's complaining.


End file.
